When Your Best Isn’t Good Enough

when your best isn't good enough

I’m missing the mark. I can see it…but it’s just out of my reach.

Beautifully cut up fruit triangles and crust-less bread in the lunch boxes.

Getting the kids to school on time.

Putting neat bows in the girl’s hair everyday.

Making sure my son’s clothes match when we’re out.

Baking daily.

Having a perfect home.

Finding stability and routine in my varied life.

Everywhere I look, I see lines. Lines everywhere, and I can’t measure up. There are too many and it hurts to stand on my toes so much.

Where do the lines come from?

The Media? Friends? Family? School?

Yes, sometimes, but mostly the lines come from me. Me trying too hard. Trying to be perfect. To somehow measure up to the invisible lines I see everywhere.

I can’t measure up, but I can do what is right. Right for my kids. For my husband. Right for me.  For my life circumstance. Right for my heart. For my Faith.

Forget perfection Kelly. Don’t try and please everyone. DO what is right. Be the best you can be.

When your best isn’t good enough: Stop. 

Be the best you can be and do what is right; that’s the line to aim for.

Do you see invisible lines? Do you feel like you don’t measure up as a Mum?

Relevant Links

Sorry the House is in a Mess

I Stay Up Too Late

What Sort of Mother Am I?

Terrible Mother Moments

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Kelly loves life at both ends of the spectrum: wearing high heel shoes one day and hiking boots the next; sipping tea out of a pretty cup and slurping hot coffee from a camping mug; challenging herself physically and stopping for quiet unhurried moments to feel the wind on her face. Kelly and her husband Matthew seek to live a fun and adventurous life with their four children and pet bird.

Latest posts by Kelly - Be A Fun Mum (see all)

Comments

  1. says

    I feel that quite often, though my bar is much lower than yours, I can tell! I gave up on bows in the hair and a perfect home looooong ago. But still, I can judge myself harshly. I’m trying not to do that. I’m trying to see how what I am doing for my kids is the most important. I hope you can see that in yourself as well. x

  2. says

    I think we all feel like that at times Kell. However the lines of which you speak are actually lies that are whispered to us. Over time we tend to believe them and so they make themselves apparent in our emotions and and our lives.
    Praise God, he has over come that, and we have the power to stand on the truth.
    Spend time with your heavenly Daddy and let him shine his light on your life, light that burns up all of the thngs he doesn’t want there. Let him lighten you load. It is the only things that works for me.
    We must get together again one day soon. I want to give you a hug <3

  3. katieb says

    What a beautifully raw post kelly, i think we all feel like this at somestage and the sad thing is most of the pressure comes from within ourselves, i know when i became pregnant with my first i read every single baby book known to man, attended every prenatal class, i had set the bar before i even experienced what it was truly like to be a mother, and then what did i feel dissapointment, until a little switch went off in my head my “lightbulb” moment when i realised that you can only do what you can do, and most of the time those “perfect” mothers that we see out and about and not as happy as they appear, im happy to be me, i still have my moments when im down and not feeling up to scratch..but my kids are happy, hubbys happy, so im happy =)

  4. says

    As a mum, I swear I’ve elevated fail to an art form. That doesn’t stop me beating myself up over it. Luckily, most of the time I concentrate on doing what you said: doing my best, and what I believe is right for me and those I love.

    If this blog were BeAPerfectMum, I for one wouldn’t be reading!

  5. Stacey K says

    Yesterday I said to my mum I didn’t get much done today, then I actually thought about it & realised how much I did do & focused on the did do’s instead of the didn’t do’s & realised I had a pretty good productive day, we played, I showered & did my hair & makeup!, we baked cookies, I got two girls asleep at the same time, I ate lunch!!, we played outside, we went to the pet shop to look at fishes, I cooked dinner including damper from scratch all with a sick baby. When I look at it like that & see all I did do instead of the washing not done & the cleaning neglected & the to-do list waiting for ticks & the planned quality time activities still a plan I am amazed by myself & I gave myself a big bowl of ICECREAM as a reward.

  6. says

    I am plagued by the very same things. I think it’s a combination of the media and the tyranny of ourselves. It strikes me that mothers have become an almost anti-feminist image. We now are expected to be the perfect, almost 1950’s style mothers. Making homemade food, keeping a perfect house, being understanding of how hard it is for our partners, raising perfect children, perfectly behaved but also balanced, securely attached individuals. It’s EXHAUSTING.

    I haven’t yet found the perfect mode of self-acceptance but I’m definitely working on it. With 3 young children, I just can’t keep it up for that much longer!

  7. says

    I wrote a very similar post a couple of days ago. My own expectations of the kind of mother I wanted to be are way higher than any that society can impose on me. I’m learning to say that my best is good enough. Children don’t care about a perfect house or bows in their hair,ref='hcare about a mum sbb65?s=100g2onclic/e8nwar pblnd thopy =)p>

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