Spot the Difference

I still play with Barbie Dolls. Miss 3 asked me to play with her the other day. After bringing me two dolls, she asked if we could swap dresses. I was shocked! The current Barbie was much thinner than the already thin Barbie stereotype.

There is pressure on young girls to conform to a certain body image. I found this interesting article called What is Beauty? from Focus on the Family. I like this quote “We must be faithful in reminding them (our girls) that beauty is not defined by a number on the scale, a premanufactured clothing size, an hourglass shape, washboard abs, slender thighs, big boobs, a J-Lo butt, pouty Angelina Jolie lips, a pair of designer low-rise jeans, a cleavage-baring top, a new sassy haircut, a clear complexion, an antiwrinkle cream, or a surgical procedure”.

Parents can use opportunities like the Barbie one, to reinforce what true beauty is. This verse from the Bible sums it up: Proverbs 31:30 “Charm can be deceiving, and beauty fades away, but a woman who honors the LORD deserves to be praised.” And Galatians 5:22-23 describes the inner beauty God gives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.

These articles are worth reading: What the Bible says About Beauty and Appearance and Talking to Your Daughter. I pulled this quote from Talking to Your Daughter: “Whether she is being influenced primarily by the media or her friends, one thing is for certain: she is hearing a buzz about what constitutes beauty in the world’s eyes. It will be especially important in these years to have open communication with your daughter regarding these messages. Take advantage of teachable moments, whether they are ads you come across or a comment made by a friend”. It is not effective to do a once-a-year talk hoping you can cover everything. Instead, it is the building into your girls life that counts. Take every opportunity to reinforce her real beauty.

I would also like to highlight the importance of the Father-Daughter relationship and self-esteem. Do you know what my three girls do when they get dressed to go out somewhere special? Without fail, they run straight to their Daddy and say “LOOK DAD!”. Responding with a hug their Daddy says “WOW! You look so beautiful”. Dr Meg Meeker, a pediatrician says “The No. 1 influence on a girl’s self-esteem is affection from her Dad”. What powerful words! What a beautiful privilege Fathers have to encourage their daughter’s true beauty. Find out more about what Dr Meeker says by reading her book Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters.

Despite the world’s bombarding view on beauty and the female image, take heart. Moment by moment, affirm and teach your girls about real beauty; the beauty of who they really are.